The Totally True Story Behind a Totally True Alien Encounter CAUGHT ON VIDEO!

No words could possibly ever express just how true this story is. Lets get started!

Imagine if you will: You're an alien from some far off civilization that has mastered all the vast intricacies of interstellar travel. You have a mission in sight that you've spent years planning. Finally you're ready. You say goodbye to your loved ones. In your language it comes out as "blarg" overlaid with the sound of someone fisting wet play-Doh. You slowly, apprehensively turn your back to you wife, your children, reminding yourself that this mission is of the utmost importance. Your life's work. With misty eyes, yet no regret, you crawl into your spaceship, fire up the engines, and set about transversing the vast cosmos of this galaxy through the used of mind blowing technology that blows through an ridiculous amount of your planets resources. An eternity goes by. Countless light years are crossed, until finally you reach your destination. Earth.

You land your space craft in a place you're sure through your superior alien intuition none of these primitive Earth people will every find it. You're a fucking pro. You GOT this. Even though you'll never see your family again, you know they'll be proud. Tears line your cheeks; a salty blue mix with the consistency somewhere between jizz and oatmeal. You think of the statues that will be made in your honor. Your time approaches.

You find a small cave. This is it. The moment of your life. Everything has been leading to this one perfect second..

You hear a rustling followed by approaching shadows. A couple of these Earth creatures come into view. All seven of your alien hearts are pumping at full speed. This is going to be so fucking sweet.

The Earthings reach the cave.. They look inside. It's dark. They don't see you. Everything is going according to plan. This is it. This is your time to shine.

You jump out and make a bunch of weird noises as a flashlight exposes you completely. The earthlings take off running.

You did it! Everything went exactly as planned. The exhilaration of the moment is overwhelming. You bask in it. Let the all the conflicting emotions overtake you. It's pure bliss.

Hours go by. The adrenaline slowly subsides, leaving behind a tingling lust that reverberates throughout your entire body. Now that it's all over it feels as if a huge burden has been lifted. Your place in history is secure. You may now be the most accomplished being in all the known universe.

There's only one thing left to do. The Earthlings are gone, surely hiding somewhere far off, basking in terror-piss. There's no better time. With thoughts bitter sweet you take one last moment to reflect one your life; on all the long hours of planning with the greatest minds of your species; of the family you sacrificed for this.

Taking one final breath you bite down on a poisoned capsule that replaced one of you teeth. Right before your body ignites into a billion subatomic explosions, you smile. This was always meant to be a one way trip. Your body becomes flames. The flames become ash, quickly blow away by a gentle breeze, until no evidence remains...

No evidence, EXCEPT THIS:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=iD_RL2drKfg